OT: Oklahoma football player bar fight

Swamp Donkey

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And what are you going to do about it? Huh?
I heard they used to call you the Mullet Ninja back in the day.

I don't want any of that.
 

PastyStoole

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Oh yeah, your cousin is Steve Shepherd, the mid 60s guy who beat up the dude that tried to mug him in WPB s few years ago, right? I remember you posted the story on here. That made the news around the world. That was a great friggin story.

BTW, did they ever catch the perp in that case?
They never caught him, and something really horrible happened to Steve over Thanksgiving. He was visiting his daughter in Pittsburgh, got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and fell down a flight of stairs. He's a quadriplegic now and in the care of his ex-wife, who is an angel, back in West Palm Beach.
 

PastyStoole

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By midnight in a college bar my gas was lethal from the rank draft beer they always served....not only could I have taken everyone in that bathroom out by a slight lift of my leg I could also have peeled the paint right off the wall...

The worst fart I ever laid was in Lexington, Kentucky, November of 2011. If they don't have a plaque on the wall of the downtown Hilton elevator commemorating the event, they certainly should.

I'd spent the week on an implementation there, drinking bourbon and eating the richest foods known to man. I'm admittedly a man who does not mind the scent of my own flatulence, no matter how noxious, but this fart was so unbearable that even I started to gag, my fine nostril hairs burning off from the hot, searing trauma. I was traveling alone in a slow elevator to the 22nd floor of the downtown Hilton for breakfast and a view, and at about Floor 16 the gas I began laying out was toxic enough to have me coughing by the time I exited. Unfortunately there was someone waiting to get on at the top floor, a lady in her 60s. No sooner had she stepped into my fresh chamber of horror did she realize the tragic mistake she'd made. I paused briefly on the outside of the elevator, our eyes met as the doors closed, she, with the look of pleading desperation that would belie a person entering this Dutch Oven at the beginning of a hellish, 22-floor descent of slow horror. Me, with a look that was part pity and part Nazi prison guard, which only served to kindle in both of us the obvious comparison to the most horrific treatments of humankind in modern history.

Did she make it to the bottom alive? Did they have to call an ambulance? Did the paramedics have to be quarantined after attending to her? I'll never know. I was busy scarfing my breakfast and complementing myself on the wonder that was my human body, planning even richer meals and wondering if the lofty feat I had just achieved could be topped.
 
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BMF

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They never caught him, and something really horrible happened to Steve over Thanksgiving. He was visiting his daughter in Pittsburgh, got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and fell down a flight of stairs. He's a quadriplegic now and in the care of his ex-wife, who is an angel, back in West Palm Beach.

Oooof! That's terrible.
 

Swamp Donkey

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They never caught him, and something really horrible happened to Steve over Thanksgiving. He was visiting his daughter in Pittsburgh, got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and fell down a flight of stairs. He's a quadriplegic now and in the care of his ex-wife, who is an angel, back in West Palm Beach.
:headslap::lol:

Cant decide which....
 

GatorInGeorgia

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They never caught him, and something really horrible happened to Steve over Thanksgiving. He was visiting his daughter in Pittsburgh, got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and fell down a flight of stairs. He's a quadriplegic now and in the care of his ex-wife, who is an angel, back in West Palm Beach.

Damn, that's terrible-I'm sorry to hear that.
 

PastyStoole

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youre not... really... considering something Pasty wrote to be serious, are you?
It's serious this time, unfortunately. I had a rough year last year. My sister died in February of complications from a brain tumor being removed, a very close friend of mine died when he was clearing his property in WV and a tree fell on him, and my cousin, who was a hero to me growing up, and was literally the most active man of his age I've ever seen became paralyzed. I wish I were joking about all those things.
 

Zambo

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They never caught him, and something really horrible happened to Steve over Thanksgiving. He was visiting his daughter in Pittsburgh, got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and fell down a flight of stairs. He's a quadriplegic now and in the care of his ex-wife, who is an angel, back in West Palm Beach.
We all have those times when we realize how close we came to disaster. A very similar thing happened to me back around 2009 or so. I was visiting my Mom at her house in New Orleans and I woke up early to go to a meeting I had in town. I was sleeping on the second floor, and it was still dark as I was walking down the hallway to the bathroom. The next thing I know, I'm falling. Its really hard to describe the complete sensory overload that happens when all of a sudden, without warning, you're flying through space in the dark. I'll never forget it.

Something in my brain stem told me to turn and curl up in the fetal position within a split second. I bounced only once on the stairs I think, then hit the wall at the bottom with my back. There was a window there, and my back hit the window ledge. I was fearing the worst. Now my adrenaline is off the charts, but I remained motionless, worried that if I had a bad back injury that moving could cause further damage. My mom, her brother and sister came running out of their rooms when they heard the commotion. I told my mom to call 911 and I told my aunt to get an icepack and put it on the center of my back where it was hurting, to keep down any swelling that might damage my spinal cord. I wiggled my fingers and toes and a huge relief passed over me. Other than that, I remained motionless until the EMTs arrived. They put me on a backboard and chauffeured me to the hospital (ox would no doubt have preferred to drive himself :lol), where after an exam by the doc they got me to my feet and walked me to get an xray. I did have a broken vertebrae but it wasn't serious.

I still think back now and then to this and other incidents as a reminder of just how quickly things can go permanently south. However, the lesson for me isn't to hide in the closet with a helmet on, but rather to live life today because you don't know if it'll be over tomorrow.
 

PastyStoole

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I still think back now and then to this and other incidents as a reminder of just how quickly things can go permanently south. However, the lesson for me isn't to hide in the closet with a helmet on, but rather to live life today because you don't know if it'll be over tomorrow.

That's a good philosophy Zambo. One to remember when we're having a bad day. Everyone here is glad you made it out of that alright.
 

GatorJ

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It's serious this time, unfortunately. I had a rough year last year. My sister died in February of complications from a brain tumor being removed, a very close friend of mine died when he was clearing his property in WV and a tree fell on him, and my cousin, who was a hero to me growing up, and was literally the most active man of his age I've ever seen became paralyzed. I wish I were joking about all those things.

so sorry to hear. Your sister was the author who was interviewed by NPR, right?
 

PastyStoole

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so sorry to hear. Your sister was the author who was interviewed by NPR, right?
That's right. She died one year ago yesterday. The NPR interview was not aired until a few months after she died.
 

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