Alright, ill play. I'm fairly confident Im not the a-hole in this scenario but ill let the jury decide.
About 4 months ago a new family moved into a house 2 doors down and across from us. We walked over after they had gotten settled and introduced ourselves. they had a middle school daughter and a boy who was same age/grade as ours (7, second grade). We talked for a few minutes and found out the boy loves and plays baseball, just like ours does.
A few days later the kid starts coming over and playing ball in the yard with our son. seems fairly harmless at first but i notice on multiple occasions that the kid is very manipulative. Every time he swings and misses it was a foul or bad pitch by my son that didnt count, every time my son gets a hit its foul or he didnt step on first base or some other nonsense. Essentially my son was being forced to throw or field the whole time and any positive play he made was argued, meanwhile no matter what the kid did, it was good and if my son made a play it was somehow wrong or cheating. This went on consistently for about a month. Credit to my son for getting frustrated but still being a good sport about it. There were a few instances where my son would refuse to give in to him, so he would pitch a fit, sling his glove and bat around the yard, and then storm home. One time he left a note on our doorstep telling my son he couldnt be freinds with him anymore lol. Also, a situation occurred early on where my son came home from being over at the kids house and informed us that the boy had told his mom to shutup when she was speaking to them and she did nothing; my son was in shock that someone his age would say that to an adult. While all this was occurring there were multiple incidents where he spoke or reacted disrespectfully to myself or my wife. After a few weeks i told my wife i had a bad feeling about the kid and his family and that i didnt want our kids going over to their house. Some of the things he would say weren't things a 7 year old says, and that coupled with the possibility that he told his mother to shut up without any consequence had me feeling strongly that there was a permissive environment of disrespect and dysfunction in that household and that he was displaying learned behaviors from within the home. At this point i advocated for speaking to his parents and not allowing our kids to associate anymore but my wife forbade it not wanting to offend.
2 weeks later i get a call while at work from my wife who is livid. Apparently the kid was at our house playing with my son. My wife gave him a complement about his baseball skills and he responded with "did i ask?" to her. She was taken back, but once again, ignored it. 5 minutes later they were watching tv when she began to tell my son he needed to get started on his homework, he cut her off and said "shut up!". At that point she finally nutted up and told him he's not to speak to adults that way and it was time for him to go home. After this I was sure we could cut the cord but nope, she wouldn't let me speak with the parents or forbid the kids from interacting. Over the next 3 weeks additional stupidity ensured but nothing that deviated from what we'd seen already. Fast fwd to 1 month later, he and my son were once again playing ball and he was griping about my son's pitching, my son by that point was no longer taking his crap and griped back. My wife walked out the front door to check on the noise just in time to hear the kid yell, "well you're a f###ing a##hole!" to my son. My wife was shocked and sternly told him to go home immediately. He had a tennis ball in his hand, he chucked it directly at my wife and stormed off. Once that happened i overrode anything she said, went straight over to their house when i got home, knocked on the door and told his mother who answered what a little sht he was and that he was no longer allowed on our property.
Of course my wife freaked out and spent a month scared and embarrassed to go outside b/c she might run into the mom. Its been a few months now and we have seen them occasionally but i guess its very awkward for my wife. I couldn't care less, its not my problem. They are raising the little a-hole, not us. The father has never once said a word about it or acknowledged anything which tells me 2 things: 1) Im correct that its a permissive environment and hes allowed to behave that way, 2) The father is a POS because as a man and a father if my son had behaved that way towards other kids and adults I would have him over there personally apologizing to each and every person, severe punishments would be on going, and I personally would reach out to anyone affected and also apologize for my son's behavior. My wife still thnks what I did by walking over to their home was too much and unnecessary.
So, was I justified, or am i the a$$hole?
