Ever had to fire a friend or had a friendship go bad over business?

Discussion in 'Business, Investing & Finance' started by Concrete Helmet, Apr 5, 2019.

  1. NVGator

    NVGator Member
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    Any good Landscaper knows you’ve have to break at least 1 or 2 sprinkler heads a trip to get the Appendix A of the contract into motion. Then you get to use the add-ons.
     
  2. BMF

    BMF Bad Mother....
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    I've loaned money, against my better judgement a few times and got burned. An ex-girlfriend who I stayed friends w/ for years asked me for $1200 ("I'll pay you back by the end of the month..."), never saw that money ever again (I did get a few blow jays along the way though).

    I loaned a friend $5k when he was starting a business about 5 years ago....still waiting to get that back.

    But, the biggest one...about 10 years ago I "bought" 6% of a business for $20K....every year I'd check in on it and he's telling me he's getting things in order, he's busy w/ his other businesses, etc. Finally about 2 years ago I hit him up and said, "Man, should I just consider this a lesson learned?" He swears up and down he's going to pay me back - he got divorced and is trying to get his sh*t together financially, but he'll pay me back. I've known this guy since the 6th grade (37+ years), he's a UF bio-mechanical engineer grad, smart as sh*t, super successful. I trusted him. I'm not holding my breath....but it just bothers me that he took the money and spent it without starting the business. Had he started the business and it failed I'd be more okay with that than what happened.
     
    #22 BMF, Apr 24, 2019
    Last edited: Apr 25, 2019
    • Concrete Helmet

      Concrete Helmet Hook, Line, and Sinker
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      I might have told them the same before I proceeded to start whipping their ass....;)
       
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      • Gator515151

        Gator515151 Well-Known Member
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        Not exactly the same but I was an inspector for 25 years. When I walked on the job everybody was my friend, they smiled, shook my hand, called me Sir and even in a round about way often offered me small bribes. When I left I could hear them mumbling in the background "That Son Of a *****". LOL
         
        • Bushmaster

          Bushmaster Well-Known Member
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          Bwahahaha!!!!!!!
           
        • daytonacane

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          Family nearly split apart. In laws wanted all their kids (4)to go in on lake front property/A-frame house. I stated I would not consider unless rules/regs of use/payment drawn up by an attorney. Mother-in-law began drawing up her own rules - i.e.: no dogs, no this, that, etc.
          I refused to participate & my husband and I were ostracized for over a year. Two sons participated and one son later sold out as he was getting a divorce. One son left holding the bag so-to-speak as retired parents could no longer afford maintenance/taxes. Our attorney told us that if we never listened to anything else, listen to this..."Never ever go into an arrangement like this with family or friends"!
           
          • Concrete Helmet

            Concrete Helmet Hook, Line, and Sinker
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            I'm still feeding out rope for my landscaper to hang himself with....He's actually showed up at all of my accounts every week since I started this thread. I did get pricing from the landscaper who does the office next door to ours and his pricing is about exactly the same so I'll be ready when my current guy f vcks up again.
             
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            • TheDouglas78

              TheDouglas78 Well-Known Member

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              When I used to help my dad with trees at Christmas, he told me never do business with family... they will always screw you whether it is intentional or not. Only had one friend/family member not pay me back on a loan, SIL needed bail so the wife and I helped out (didn't pay the whole thing)… she keeps telling us how after the next tax return or the next what ever she is going to pay us back. I've written it off, but not loaning money out again to her.
               
            • MJMGator

              MJMGator Slightly amused
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              The obvious question that needs to be answered is what was she in the pokey for?
               
            • LagoonGator68

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              Just hand the guy a clearly written letter stating what you want , when and how...no extras without prior approval....jfc....
               
            • Concrete Helmet

              Concrete Helmet Hook, Line, and Sinker
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              That's the whole point of the thread, DS:facepalm:,....
              You would think being friends with someone for close to 20 years that you wouldn't have to. Again this isn't someone that I hired off the street, it's someone who I helped to start a business and helped get established. It's also someone I've pounded thousands of beers with, watched numerous Gator games with, b!tched to when I was going through a divorce and listened to when they were doing the same....I've fired hundreds of people in my earlier profession but never had to fire a friend.
               
              #31 Concrete Helmet, May 15, 2019
              Last edited: May 15, 2019
              • Bushmaster

                Bushmaster Well-Known Member
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                The fact that you are agonizing over this tells me you are a decent guy. Firing a friend is tough. I always look at arguments/conflict as whether I value the friendship more than the issue and whether the person is taking advantage of the issue BECAUSE of the friendship.

                In my practice, there are times where I ask a friend to let me extend a return because I am swamped where I may not ask another client there. Yes, I am taking advantage of a friendship. Yes, they know it. No, they don't care. But, their grass isn't 12 inches tall in front of their house either and I am not billing them for doing work I didn't do.
                 
                • Concrete Helmet

                  Concrete Helmet Hook, Line, and Sinker
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                  I know sooner or later it's most likely gonna happen. Here's the thing with this dude
                  He has a bit of history with taking advantage of situations in the past and it's cost him. He was fired from both of the jobs we worked together. Once for using company property without consent and once for brokering deals behind the business owners back(cutting them out of consignment) because he thought no one was paying attention.....
                  I like the guy and I've tried hard to help him with numerous referrals and tons of extra cleanout, hauling and light tree work jobs but I guess some people never learn.
                   
                  • Detroitgator

                    Detroitgator General Factotum
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                    Yeah, you stepped in it knowingly and made the mistake of thinking he wouldn’t do it to you.
                     
                  • Mind_the_Gap

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                    Dave Ramsey advises to never loan money to family or friends. If they need it, and you can afford it, give it to them with the expectation it will never be repaid.

                    The Danger Zone

                    "So the old joke goes: if you lend your brother-in-law $50 and he never talks to you again, was it worth the investment?

                    "The joke may be funny, but experiencing this in real life is anything but funny. Loaning money to a friend or family member is a bad decision. Someone who lends money to a loved one has their heart—not their head—in the right place. It is okay to give money, but loaning money to someone with whom you have a relationship will lead to broken hearts and broken wallets.

                    "Check out the statistics from a recent money-etiquette survey:

                    • 57% of people said they have seen a friendship or relationship ruined because one person didn't pay back the other.
                    • Almost 50% have loaned $100 or more to help out someone, but 55% don't get repaid.
                    • 71% lend money to immediate family members, 57% to relatives, and 54% to friends.
                    "One fact not quoted in the survey is that Thanksgiving dinner tastes 100% better when friends or relatives don't owe one another money! Eating with your master is different than eating with your family.

                    "Loaning money makes relationships awkward. Parents who lend their newly married daughter and her husband a down payment for a house think they are helping out the new family. Soon, however, they are giving the young couple disapproving looks when an upcoming vacation becomes more important than repaying the loan. This leads to nothing but resentment and pain on both sides."
                     
                    • Concrete Helmet

                      Concrete Helmet Hook, Line, and Sinker
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                      Honestly I kinda suspected it would end up here one day. I'm a nice guy but I also have no problem torching the past when I'm done with someone....
                       
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                      • NovaGator

                        NovaGator Well-Known Member

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                        In 1987, I was 2 years in to a very successful automotive aftermarket franchise.
                        We were doing fairly well, but the amount of work was over whelming. I hired a man
                        who I had met at a business that I was doing work for. For the first year, it was great.
                        He was the best salesman/closer that I had ever met. I had promised him a 33% raise
                        in 12 months if things worked out, but he had increased sales so much that I gave him
                        the raise after 4 months. But then things began to change. My thoughts are that he felt
                        he was the reason for our success, and obviously thought that he could make all that
                        money for himself. His sales took a nose dive, and his salary then became a drain.
                        I really thought a lot of the guy, and it was with a heavy heart that I had to broom him
                        out the door. So what did he do? He borrowed $35000 (from my banker, no less) and
                        then opened up the same type of business as an independent. He did his best to take my
                        customers, hire away my employees, took out ads in which he made snide comments about
                        my operation. Well, the man had over the years proven that he was the type of guy who should
                        always work for somebody else. He was a great number 2 guy but was a disaster as number 1.
                        His business lasted about 8 months. The money was gone, his checks were worthless, and couldn't
                        even cover payroll on a regular basis. His outstanding debt had ballooned to $350K with no means
                        to ever repay it. All his suppliers put him on C.O.D. and he then had little choice but to declare bankruptcy.

                        The day after his case was heard in court, he came to my business, poured himself a cup of coffee,
                        sat down at my desk and broke into tears. I felt so bad for him that I loaned him $2500 which I never got back. But I didn't care. He was my buddy, and I have always made it a policy to never lend someone more money than I could afford to just give them. 10 years later, at age 57, he died of a heart attack. I spoke at his funeral. I felt that I had lost a brother.
                         
                        #37 NovaGator, Aug 27, 2019
                        Last edited: Aug 27, 2019
                        • bradgator2

                          bradgator2 Internet Bully
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                          Damn. Thanks for sharing.
                           
                        • Bushmaster

                          Bushmaster Well-Known Member
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                          Maybe he reads this board??
                           
                        • Concrete Helmet

                          Concrete Helmet Hook, Line, and Sinker
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                          I love my Brother but I have also beaten the chit out of him for far less....:lol2:
                           
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