Florida Man

[Swamp Queen]

This one almost deserves its own thread. I wouldn’t be surprised if this is a Gatorchatter member.

A Florida Man Met Another Guy On A Eunuch Fetish Site Then Castrated Him, Police Say

According to the arrest report, Van Ryswyk told the deputies he had just removed the testicles of a man he'd met on "a website for those that have a fetish for castration."

In Van Ryswyk's guest bedroom, deputies found the 53-year-old man from the Tampa area holding a bloody towel on his groin. His testicles were in a jar by the side of the bed.

Investigators said Van Ryswyk told them that he and the man had met one week earlier and tried to perform the procedure, but that the man had become aroused and ejaculated while Van Ryswyk tried to sanitize his penis, meaning the surgery had to be delayed.

 

[Gatordiddy]

This one almost deserves its own thread

"These (911 hang up calls) are pretty routine and deputies respond to many of them per shift," the sheriff's office said in a Facebook post. "But most of them don’t make the cut when it comes to being memorable."

 

[Musclepug]

ℂℚℤ ℝℕ (@JacquezGreen) tweeted at 2:07 PM on Fri, Oct 04, 2019:
Florida Man Oversleeps Jury Duty, Goes to Jail for 10 Days Florida Man Oversleeps Jury Duty, Goes to Jail for 10 Days via @nbc6
()

 

[Gator515151]

WTF?
https://nypost.com/2019/10/07/florida-man-arrested-for-trying-to-get-alligator-drunk/

 

[Bait'n Gator]

WTF?
https://nypost.com/2019/10/07/florida-man-arrested-for-trying-to-get-alligator-drunk/

Honestly if your drinking beer and you catch an alligator who wouldn't see if it would drink beer?

 

[Musclepug]

 

[Thought Criminal]

View attachment 17479

As best I could guess from the movie, Olaf would be totally down with this.

 

[soflagator]

I know PB/Broward/Dade have the traffic, rude people, the Dolphins, and some obnoxious Italian, Spanish and Jewish people. But the more I read this thread, what the heck is going on in central and western Florida? Seems like every one of these stories is from Polk, Pinellas, Hillsborough or Marion.

Plenty of problems in SoFla, but I don’t hear about castration fetishes and people banging stuffed animals at the store.

 

[MJMGator]

I know PB/Broward/Dade have the traffic, rude people, the Dolphins, and some obnoxious Italian, Spanish and Jewish people. But the more I read this thread, what the heck is going on in central and western Florida? Seems like every one of these stories is from Polk, Pinellas, Hillsborough or Marion.

Plenty of problems in SoFla, but I don’t hear about castration fetishes and people banging stuffed animals at the store.

I’ve noticed the same thing. The Melbourne area seems like it’s full of crazies.

 

[Gator By Marriage]

I know PB/Broward/Dade have the traffic, rude people, the Dolphins, and some obnoxious Italian, Spanish and Jewish people. But the more I read this thread, what the heck is going on in central and western Florida? Seems like every one of these stories is from Polk, Pinellas, Hillsborough or Marion.

Plenty of problems in SoFla, but I don’t hear about castration fetishes and people banging stuffed animals at the store.

My in-laws live in Pasco and they seem to have their fair share of these crazies as well. It's always a hoot to read their local paper. They also have a Wal-mart nearby that could easily provide half the pictures for a "People of Wal-Mart" thread.

 

[soflagator]

I’ve noticed the same thing. The Melbourne area seems like it’s full of crazies.

My only complaint about Brevard is that it takes 6 hours to drive through it on 95. It’s the Texas of Florida counties. But its proximity to both the Ocala and Daytona areas probably doom it.

It’s my understanding that the word Volusia is a cross between Spanish and Native American tribes meaning “meth”.

 

[Swamp Queen]

I know PB/Broward/Dade have the traffic, rude people, the Dolphins, and some obnoxious Italian, Spanish and Jewish people. But the more I read this thread, what the heck is going on in central and western Florida? Seems like every one of these stories is from Polk, Pinellas, Hillsborough or Marion.

Plenty of problems in SoFla, but I don’t hear about castration fetishes and people banging stuffed animals at the store.

I grew up in Polk County and live on the border of Hillsborough and Pasco. It’s best if you just stay far far away! Crazies grow on trees!

And Brad lives in Marion, enough said.

 

[Fodderwing]

Equal opportunities for the wimminz!

Florida woman bites boyfriend's penis after accusing him of cheating: police

A Florida woman allegedly bit her boyfriend’s penis and threatened him with a knife after she accused him of wanting to have sex with another woman, a report said.

The alleged assault happened during an hourslong drinking session in Miami Beach that ended at about 3 a.m. Wednesday,

 

[Gatordiddy]

Equal opportunities for the wimminz!

Florida woman bites boyfriend's penis after accusing him of cheating: police

A Florida woman allegedly bit her boyfriend’s penis and threatened him with a knife after she accused him of wanting to have sex with another woman, a report said.

The alleged assault happened during an hourslong drinking session in Miami Beach that ended at about 3 a.m. Wednesday,

well... at least the burrito is still attached to his body.

 

[Musclepug]

I'm late with this one, but here's her picture

 

[GatorFL]

I'm late with this one, but here's her picture

She sort of looks like your avatar.

 

[crosscreekcooter]

Florida man spits food into woman's mouth in road rage encounter, police say
A Florida man was arrested after he allegedly spit food into a woman's mouth in a bizarre road rage incident last month, police said.

David Wipperman, 61, was taken into custody Thursday in connection with the incident on Oct. 29, when Wipperman got out of his truck and approached a woman driving nearby just before 6 p.m.

It's unclear where the two were during the encounter, but Wipperman walked up to the woman, and she rolled down the window of her sedan to apologize, according to the Tampa Bay Times. That's when, authorities say, the man spit the food he was chewing at her.

David Wipperman, 61, allegedly spit food he was chewing at a woman during a weird road rage incident in Florida last month, according to investigators. (Pinellas County Sheriff's Office)

“The food struck the victim in the face and entered (her) mouth,” an arrest report states, per the Times.

The 61-year-old man is then accused of opening the woman's car door, allegedly screaming at her and pointing his finger in her face.

Wipperman was arrested several weeks after the apparent incident, according to online records from the Pinellas County Sheriff's Office. He was taken into custody on charges of felony battery and burglary of an occupied vehicle, and as of Sunday was being held at the Pinellas County Jail.

 

[Treebeard]

 

[AuggieDosta]

I'm late with this one, but here's her picture

She does look a little cockeyed.

 

[Thought Criminal]

Would still tap, carefully.