Muh Muh Muh My Corona

[destingator]

I'm pretty sure that's oral syphilis.

Your mommas cooch was rancid.

 

[Swamp Donkey]

Your mommas cooch was rancid.

I would assume so. She's been dead eight years. But you do you.

Was Zambo there also?

 

[destingator]

I would assume so. She's been dead eight years. But you do you.

Was Zambo there also?

Why? Is he known to be into old dead chicks?

 

[NVGator]

Your mommas cooch was rancid.

Burn

 

[Durty South Swamp]

The backstory here is Durty disappeared for a short time in the early days of Covid. This was back when the Chicken Littles thought the WuFlu was going to be Captain Tripps and kill everybody.

Of course if Durty missed a couple of days of posting, it must mean he died of Covid so I wrote a tongue-in-cheek eulogy for him (he didn't really have Covid, he was just busy with the real world).

Several months later, Swonk disappeared for a few days and I recycled the eulogy (with some edits) for Swonk.

I can find the Swonk version but I think the original Durty version has been forever lost in the ether. Swonk version: https://gatorchatter.com/threads/swonkey-to-the-rescue.29057/#post-1191761

Durty famously married up, far outkicking his coverage, so one of the bits in his eulogy was about the line to hit on his lovely widow starting behind me. Tasteless? Yes. Mildly amusing? Also yes.

Durty is a great guy, smart, funny (though not as funny as his toe, but that remains a mystery and another backstory for another time) and he really has a beautiful young family.

Best wishes for a full and speedy recovery Durty. Chesty Puller famously said "There aren't enough Chinamen in the world to stop a fully armed Marine regiment from going where ever they want to go." I'll paraphrase and say there aren't enough Chinese germs in the world to stop a badass Marine like you. You and your family are in my prayers.

Alex.

I'm army bruh lol

 

[Durty South Swamp]

Loser. And even more of a loser to get tested. I’m sure @78 and @gator1946 are gonna eat this up.

Didn't have a choice. Whole thing started bc my son was sent home from school bc someone in his class tested positive. In order to keep my daughter in class we had to show that he and everyone else in the fam was negative. Both of us felt fine when we got tested and we're shocked to get the results. My wife had been dealing with it but it was mild, she thought it was seasonal allergies. I felt perfectly healthy, but about an hr after we returned from the test site I went down hard. I went from completely fine to fever, chills, and shakes in a 10 minute span.

Feeling alot better this morning. Low fever, very mild headache, some sniffles but no more hot cold or shakes.

Unfortunately bc of the results both kids are now forced to miss school and gymnastics and karate. My son was supposed to test for his next belt this week, he's really upset. Feel terrible for him.

 

[wrpgator]

Durty and Mrs D are positive. She's already over it, my symptoms just started. 103 temp, headache, cold chills. No sniffle, cough, or throat issues tho.

Queue up @AlexDaGator brilliant eulogy prose

This is a man who does not laugh, but you and Mrs. Durt made his day...

Hope it's a mild case.

 

[gatormandan]

Classic chatter thread. Would read again.

 

[Towels 'N Sporks]

Why is there a personal anecdote about corona in the sports forums? Do we not have to hear about this crap all day enough already?

I don't understand. The b*tching and moaning about corona in this place is so played out. Brought to you by the same people complaining about there being too much politics in sports. I agree that there is too much politics in sports, by the way. Why do we have to contribute to it?

We get it. You think(know) it's fake. You think(know) people are dumb if they take it seriously and need to use this place to make jabs at them because someone having a different opinion than you is taken as some sort of personal slight. You think(know) the country is turning communist. This isn't sports talk.

 

[BNAG8R]

Why is there a personal anecdote about corona in the sports forums? Do we not have to hear about this crap all day enough already?

I don't understand. The b*tching and moaning about corona in this place is so dumb and played out. Brought to you by the same people complaining about there being too much politics in sports. I agree that there is too much politics in sports, by the way. Why do we have to contribute to it?

We get it. You think(know) it's fake. You think(know) people are dumb if they take it seriously and need to use this place to make jabs at them because someone having a different opinion than you is taken as some sort of personal slight. You think(know) the country is turning communist. This isn't sports talk.

I say this with the utmost respect and decorum - you’re a f*cking idiot. This thread has literally zero of the things you are bytching about.

You're more than welcome to leave this place that triggers you so.

 

[Towels 'N Sporks]

I say this with the utmost respect and decorum - you’re a f*cking idiot. This thread has literally zero of the things you are bytching about.

You're more than welcome to leave this place that triggers you so.

This thread isn't a personal anecdote with a bunch of comments making sarcastic remarks about a virus? It's about sports?

 

[GatorJB]

This thread isn't a personal anecdote with a bunch of comments making sarcastic remarks about a virus? It's about sports?

Someone did just attempt to derail the thread by complaining about the thread and those posting in it, so perhaps this is an appropriate main sports thread after all?

On a side note, hope you feel better soon, Durty.

 

[MidwestChomp]

Durty famously married up, far outkicking his coverage

Alex.

Right. So once Durty dies, there is 100% no chance anyone from this board would have a shot at Mrs. Durty.

 

[TheDouglas78]

that probably took about 7 seconds

the same amount of time it took you to make your last kid.

 

[TheDouglas78]

Right. So once Durty dies, there is 100% no chance anyone from this board would have a shot at Mrs. Durty.

Coming from a dude that has bred his fellow bunny to a wimens basketball starting 5.

 

[AlexDaGator]

Right. So once Durty dies, there is 100% no chance anyone from this board would have a shot at Mrs. Durty.

Accurate.

Alex.

 

[Bait'n Gator]

Why is there a personal anecdote about corona in the sports forums? Do we not have to hear about this crap all day enough already?

I don't understand. The b*tching and moaning about corona in this place is so played out. Brought to you by the same people complaining about there being too much politics in sports. I agree that there is too much politics in sports, by the way. Why do we have to contribute to it?

We get it. You think(know) it's fake. You think(know) people are dumb if they take it seriously and need to use this place to make jabs at them because someone having a different opinion than you is taken as some sort of personal slight. You think(know) the country is turning communist. This isn't sports talk.

Well, found another inhabitant of 78's pussy planet.

 

[AlexDaGator]

I'm army bruh lol

I blame early-onset senility.

Still a good Chesty Puller quote.


Alex.

 

[Durty South Swamp]

Good christ. This is a lighthearted thread about dealing with the virus and allowing everyone to roast me.

It's great comedy. Ffs adjust your skirt.

 

[Ancient Reptile]

Good luck, Durty. Hope you are soon better.