Seedy and CD's little girl is getting hitched, hit 'em with your best wedding tips

[CDGator]

Immediately following the end of the wedding, there's always formal picture time for the wedding party and immediate family. By then, everybody is tired, hungry, and thirsty. While the guests are enjoying the open bar and heavy hors d'oeuvres (we REALLY need to Americanize that spelling to orderves), the wedding party is freakin' dying. Then the wedding party has to line up to be introduced and seated and that takes forever too. Immediately transition to the first dance, then the toast, these people are suffering. Don't let that happen.

Pack a cooler full of ice and small bottles of water and have some orderves (see how easy that is?) stashed aside for the wedding party to crush during picture time before they are introduced and join the reception.

Alex.

Can we hire you to write the vows and plan the wedding? You really seem to be on top of this.
@soflagator has graciously offered to have it at his house. Which one of your guys will cater the affair? Isn’t there a DJ here?
Sounds like the making of an epic party.

 

[Altitude Gator]

Married a Polish broad in Nebraska. Chicken dance, flying Dutchman, cotton eyed Joe! All fun. Her best friend was a very big gal who darn near took my arm off on the flying Dutchman!

At the reception, they did a dollar dance with the bride and groom. Raised good cash for the honeymoon. Always a hit! Dads and moms get first dance and traditionally pay $100 to start the procession.

Between the wedding and reception, while setting up the reception hall, the bridesmaids stole the groom and the groomsmen stole the bride. Took a tour of local bars for a drink at each place. Wife puked just as we entered the reception hall for a long evening. Her brother told the other groomsmen she like tequila!

And, of course, drive a Model A!

 

[AlexDaGator]

Can we hire you to write the vows and plan the wedding? You really seem to be on top of this.
@soflagator has graciously offered to have it at his house. Which one of your guys will cater the affair? Isn’t there a DJ here?
Sounds like the making of an epic party.

I know what I’m talking about.

I’ve given away the bride 4 times (but none have been my daughter).

I’ve been the best man 3 times (yet I have no brother).

I married one girl 2 times in 4 months (but have never been divorced).

I have written 1 set of vows (but didn’t need them).

I’ve sung the last song with the band 3 times (but nobody heard me).

I’ve lifted the bride in a chair and danced while wearing a yarmulke (but I’m not Jewish).

I had the most memorable dance with the bride at 2 different weddings (but neither one was my wedding, and one was a wedding I crashed).

I lost count of how many times I’ve been a groomsman or usher, how many toasts I’ve given, and how many tuxes I’ve rented (much less how many weddings I’ve attended).


Alex.

 

[NVGator]

Have them go down to the Justice of the Peace and call it good. When she’s done with school, throw a graduation/reception party.

 

[CDGator]

I know what I’m talking about.

I’ve given away the bride 4 times (but none have been my daughter).

I’ve been the best man 3 times (yet I have no brother).

I married one girl 2 times in 4 months (but have never been divorced).

I have written 1 set of vows (but didn’t need them).

I’ve sung the last song with the band 3 times (but nobody heard me).

I’ve lifted the bride in a chair and danced while wearing a yarmulke (but I’m not Jewish).

I had the most memorable dance with the bride at 2 different weddings (but neither one was my wedding, and one was a wedding I crashed).

I lost count of how many times I’ve been a groomsman or usher, how many toasts I’ve given, and how many tuxes I’ve rented (much less how many weddings I’ve attended).


Alex.

Intriguing post. So many questions.

 

[gingerlover]

The advice is good and greatly appreciated. Keep it coming.

First, we’ve been told it will be after Lil CD graduates college so we have two years to save and plan for a wedding.

Second, Seedy and I are planting the bug in her ear that they should consider a destination wedding like @gingerlover suggests. Seedy and I went to Hawaii to get married and his parents joined us for a few days. The hotel faxed me a one page questionnaire about the cake and colors etc and then we showed up on the beach. Perfect.

If we could go back me and my wife would’ve done this. Her family is a huge Catholic family so we had to try to plan to accommodate everyone from her side. Would’ve been much easier to have a destination wedding like Hawaii and then come back and throwing a party in my hometown and her hometown.

A buddy of mine from college got married at the same time. They were like us from two different states. They went to Hawaii, told their family and friends when they were going and then told them that if they wanted to come, they would love to have them there , on the way back, they stopped in Oklahoma for a party there and then back to Georgia for a party there.

 

[5-Star Finger]

Married a Polish broad in Nebraska. Chicken dance, flying Dutchman, cotton eyed Joe! All fun. Her best friend was a very big gal who darn near took my arm off on the flying Dutchman!

At the reception, they did a dollar dance with the bride and groom. Raised good cash for the honeymoon. Always a hit! Dads and moms get first dance and traditionally pay $100 to start the procession.

Between the wedding and reception, while setting up the reception hall, the bridesmaids stole the groom and the groomsmen stole the bride. Took a tour of local bars for a drink at each place. Wife puked just as we entered the reception hall for a long evening. Her brother told the other groomsmen she like tequila!

And, of course, drive a Model A!

View attachment 57320

Bridesmaid on the left is the type that will cut you right after climax.

 

[cover2]

The photographer. Make sure to get only the pix you want…

 

[TLB]

5. Be Prepared for Wardrobe Malfunctions. Sh!t happens.

I was one of the groomsmen in my sister's wedding. Made it through the entire Catholic wedding and 3h reception, then returned to the hotel room to change and found my fly had been open the whole time.

 

[cover2]

I was one of the groomsmen in my sister's wedding. Made it through the entire Catholic wedding and 3h reception, then returned to the hotel room to change and found my fly had been open the whole time.

Bad sign if nobody told you OR if the cute guy with the catering outfit was on it immediately.

 

[Nalt]

I agree with NVGator, tell them to elope. Much cheaper and extremely less stress on EVERYONE!

I was best man for a guy I worked with back in the early '80's. He had been telling me for several months, "You need to meet my niece" and at the same time telling his niece, "You need to meet this guy from work." I met his niece at the wedding practice the night before the wedding. She was really cute and the best part, she was a red-head. I know GingerLover can appreciate that. At the end of the wedding, his niece caught the bouquet and I somehow managed to catch the garter. I asked her out on a date for that night and she agreed. We married 2-1/2 years later. That was 37-1/2 years ago...

Oh, @CD and @Seedy, tell her to have a destination or JOP wedding.

 

[Double Gator Dad]

Steal a page from the Mike Leach ‘Advice To Live By’ and offer the couple $10,000 to elope.

 

[B52G8rAC]

Steal a page from the Mike Leach ‘Advice To Live By’ and offer the couple $10,000 to elope.

My FIL did that. Said he would give me 5K and provide a ladder. My MIL had a fit. We had a house wedding, and it probably didn't cost 5K back then, but...

 

[I Have No Friends :(]

Can we hire you to write the vows and plan the wedding? You really seem to be on top of this.
@soflagator has graciously offered to have it at his house. Which one of your guys will cater the affair? Isn’t there a DJ here?
Sounds like the making of an epic party.

 

[CDGator]

You’re hired. Are the doves extra?

 

[Durty South Swamp]

Bang one of the brides maids in the broom closet.

 

[CDGator]

Oh my, y’all are making a compelling argument for them to elope.

 

[B52G8rAC]

Oh my, y’all are making a compelling argument for them to elope.

Just trying to save Y'all money.

 

[Durty South Swamp]

I know what I’m talking about.

I’ve given away the bride 4 times (but none have been my daughter).

I’ve been the best man 3 times (yet I have no brother).

I married one girl 2 times in 4 months (but have never been divorced).

I have written 1 set of vows (but didn’t need them).

I’ve sung the last song with the band 3 times (but nobody heard me).

I’ve lifted the bride in a chair and danced while wearing a yarmulke (but I’m not Jewish).

I had the most memorable dance with the bride at 2 different weddings (but neither one was my wedding, and one was a wedding I crashed).

I lost count of how many times I’ve been a groomsman or usher, how many toasts I’ve given, and how many tuxes I’ve rented (much less how many weddings I’ve attended).


Alex.

Jesus Christ bro, save some p*ssy for the rest of us....

 

[Altitude Gator]

Bridesmaid on the left is the type that will cut you right after climax.

Groomsman right behind her is my BIL. They got married a few years after us. Three kids and and 25 years later, I don't think she has cut him up yet.