The WNBA - why does it exist?

Discussion in 'Main Sports Forum' started by oxrageous, Jan 4, 2016.

  1. Durty South Swamp

    Durty South Swamp doodley doodley doo!
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    Seems like a good time to repost this one :lol:

     
    • Okeechobee Joe

      Okeechobee Joe Lost Ball in High Grass
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      • Ray Finkle

        Ray Finkle Fallen Mod
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        When does the Summers Eve summer league start?
         
        • PastyStoole

          PastyStoole Man, there's no boundary line to art. ~Bird Parker
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          Browsing through the Lesbian Times last week, as is my common practice, I came across this article on Paul Westhead's famous Phoenix Mercury team, whose exciting brand of play set an attendance record in 2006 at 683 fans per game that still stands. Here is an excerpt:

          The 'Mono Stat Seven.' Where are they Today?
          By Judy Weld

          Paul Westhead's innovative brand of specialization in his WNBA players saw lesbians from all over Phoenix flock to the War Memorial Auditorium to see the Mercury play. With each of his seven player rotation focusing on a single statistic in their stat line, the press soon coined the nickname for his team "The Mono Stat Seven." We've had many readers ask about their whereabouts, so we've done the research...

          Erica Massingill - This fiery Point Guard and team leader played with vim and vinegar on every possession. She led the league in assists for three straight years while with the Mercury. Today she's a motorcycle mechanic in South Mesa, Arizona.

          Aneeka Denttaldam - This dutch giant played center for four years with the Phoenix Mercury and led the league in blocked shots each year. She's currently working as a welder in St. Paul, Minnesota.

          Michelle Yeestie - After being traded from the Milwaukee Froth, Michelle Yeestie became the most prolific 3-point scorer in WNBA history, amassing 28 3-pointers over her nine year career. She was known for the flawless way she executed the 'two-handed chest heave' on her shots, and while they often hit the bottom of the rim, nearly one in ten of her three-pointers went in. Her career .083 3-point shooting percentage still stands as the league's all-time best. Today, Michelle lives with her partner and multiple pit bulls in Victorville, California.

          Rhoada Mullet - Known as the "Bill Laimbeer of the WNBA," Rhoada was a bruising power forward who led the league in rebounding several times. She also led the league in technical fouls, picking up 42 in one season alone, (although 23 of those were uniform violations associated with her wallet chain). Her unique 'box out' technique in the paint, where she'd put her hands on her hips and thrust her pelvis forward still strikes fearful memories for anyone who witnessed it. Rhoada died of injuries sustained in a three and a half hour lesbian cat fight with her live in girlfriend that also left their apartment in shambles.

          Holly Fingers - Holly had a reputation for aggressively going to the hole and being "great in the box." She was also a good basketball player. She led the league in steals four times, (although most of them were the unforced turnovers that count as 'steals' in the WNBA). The niece of baseball hall-of-famer Rollie Fingers, Holly also sported a signature handlebar mustache, (but not on her face). Her hard partying style of living was notorious in the Phoenix lesbian scene and she was known for picking up a different friend every night. She died in 2011 of Throat HPV.

          World Stay Free - A prolific scorer in the mould of her famous uncle World B. Free, World Stay Free still holds the record for most points in a single WNBA game with 26. During the high scoring 2006 season that saw the Mercury averaging a league-record 53.4 points per game, World Stay Free was the league's leading scorer, averaging nearly 14 points a game. World Stay Free is now a WNBA commentator and spokesperson for Johnson & Johnson.

          Gina Lapper - Gina led the league in free throws and free throw percentage in six of her eight years in the league. Like most of the league she shot her free throws granny-style, from between the legs, but her 78% free throw percentage in 2009 is still an all-time record. Today, she's a plumber in East Tempe, Arizona.


           
          #104 PastyStoole, Feb 26, 2019
          Last edited: Feb 26, 2019
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          • rogdochar

            rogdochar Senior Member
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            It's their interim period right now.
             
            • Phineus Maximus

              Phineus Maximus Thread Killer
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              Funny you mention curling. I actually love watching this AND the females in it are usually attractive. I would actually watch this league, LOL.
               
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              • oxrageous

                oxrageous It's Good to be King
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                Great defense by the girl underneath the basket. She acts like the shooter has leprosy. And check out #5! Not exactly Dennis Rodman on D.
                 
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                • Jack o' Diamonds

                  Jack o' Diamonds My mind is made up, don't confuse me with facts...
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                  upload_2019-2-26_14-14-12.jpeg

                  Curling??
                   
                  • PastyStoole

                    PastyStoole Man, there's no boundary line to art. ~Bird Parker
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                    My daughter started playing basketball recently in a YMCA league. She's seven years old and one of two girls on the team. The difference in skill level between boys and girls that age is astounding. Truthfully, they shouldn't even let girls on the court. My daughter is a very good athlete, too. She beats kids four grades older than her in track meets and scores multiple touchdowns in flag football at her school. We play a lot of basketball together, too, and she loves the sport. But it's simply not a girl's sport. She can steal the ball and mix it up on the floor like an animal, but anything beyond that is cringeworthy. What's worse is that the refs favor the girls, so they get away with ridiculous violations.

                    There's an African American boy on her team that is very, very good. I think his 6'2 mom played college ball. (Would absolutely climb that tree, BTW). The ref called him for palming the ball like 8 times last game, no exaggeration. He was basically doing exactly what he's watched Russell Westbrook do everytime he touches the ball. Meanwhile, my daughter finds the ball in her hands by some fluke, and without even taking a dribble walks across the court with it for four or five steps and the ref doesn't even put the whistle in his mouth. She does this multiple times and no one seems to care. Why? Because she's a girl, and for some strange reason we feel like we need to give girls special privileges in our society, including pretending they belong in a game that is almost impossible for them to be competent at.
                     
                    #109 PastyStoole, Feb 26, 2019
                    Last edited: Feb 26, 2019
                    • oxrageous

                      oxrageous It's Good to be King
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                      I know I've told this story before, but my best friend's sister was on the basketball team at Buchholz High School in 1995 or so. As a team, they were bad even for girls basketball, losing games by scores like 56-12, and stuff like that. Getting to 15 points in a game was like climbing Everest, they were that horrific on offense. Cringe-worthy stuff.

                      So one day him and I go to one of the home games, take our seats in the bleachers, and then whip out brown paper bags with holes for the eyes and put them on (the team was already down 20 or 30 points by now). Just like this:

                      [​IMG]

                      Eventually, someone noticed, then nudged the person next to them to take a look, then everyone was turning around and looking at us and cracking up laughing. What wasn't as funny was seeing the home PLAYERS looking up at us. :lol: The look on his sister's face was priceless.

                      She stayed mad at us for quite a while. It's the only time I've ever banned the bag at a sporting event....if you can call it that.

                      Pasty said it, if there's one sport that women simply are not physically made for, it's basketball. It's almost always painful to watch, even from the "pros".
                       
                      • NavetG8r

                        NavetG8r Stupid
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                        What did you do with Brad's hamster?
                         
                      • PastyStoole

                        PastyStoole Man, there's no boundary line to art. ~Bird Parker
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                        Has anyone solved this mystery yet?
                         
                        • soflagator

                          soflagator Senior Member
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                          I’m hearing that they’re still planning to have an upcoming season. Just without any fans in the stands.
                           
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                          • Musclepug

                            Musclepug never go full retard
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                            Thank god!!


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                          • Woodstork

                            Woodstork Well-Known Member

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                            So, no changes from the pre-pandemic seating is required.
                             
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                            • Woodstork

                              Woodstork Well-Known Member

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                              Woman’s basketball is the sports equivalent of pineapple pizza.
                               
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                              • Swamp Donkey

                                Swamp Donkey Bring Back Squash
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                                If you're in a banning mood, this is where you should start.

                                We don't need this on our board.
                                 
                                • aka

                                  aka I Deliver
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                                  Especially if they grunt when they hit the ball.
                                   
                                • PastyStoole

                                  PastyStoole Man, there's no boundary line to art. ~Bird Parker
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                                  Go play intermural Quidditch, you homo. :lol:
                                   
                                  • Phineus Maximus

                                    Phineus Maximus Thread Killer
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