OK - I'm not proud of it, but I do have some car sales experience in my background, both times as interim stops as my "real" job search dragged on. The first was at a multi-point shop in Tampa and the second was at a BMW point in Atlanta. I hate to admit this, but literally everyone who wants to make a career in sales should be required to spend a year moving metal. These were incredible learning and character building experiences. I had a lot of success and learned a lot (not the least of which was to hate myself after some grotesque, "4-pounder" deals that preyed on people that didn't know better). The monthly award plaques are still in a box somewhere, but, I digress.... Both stints were a long time ago, and likely things have changed somewhat.
Understand that literally everything about a car dealership is set up to extract as much money from you as possible. Everything. Every little thing they can add to a bump sticker - dealer prep, PDI fees, door edge guards, wheel mouldings, window etching... and finance.
They will do nothing that doesn't make them money.
What others have said about your trade is true. You'll likely get more for your 4Runner if you sell it yourself. The flipside is, you have to run an ad, keep her detailed, meet all sorts of potentially weird people, do test drives, etc. It is a hassle and like you said, might not be worth the headache for a few extra dollars. Your decision....
Preparation is key! Before you go shopping, determine how you plan to acquire the car - lease or purchase. Given the vintage of your 4Runner, I will assume you will purchase. Next step - and this is critical: Go to your bank/credit union and get your finance arranged. Have that in your back pocket. Given year-end deals, it is possible you might be able to get better rates/terms from the dealer. But NEVER rely on them. That F&I "manager" is likely to be the best and trickiest closer you meet.
If you buy new, you won't benefit from depreciation, but you will be able to take the VIN of the vehicle and surf the web to find out what the best deals are to ensure you're leaving as little on the table as possible. Give or take volume discounts and factors between the dealer and manufacturer you likely can never know, data on new cars should be pretty uniform. At this time of year there will likely be incentives both from the dealer and the manufacturer on new units.
If you buy a used car, yes, someone else will have taken the hit on depreciation, but you can never really know what the seller has into the vehicle (meaning how much did they pay to get the car on their lot either in trade or at an auction). Plus, there is some small risk with regard to how the original owner drove and cared for the car you avoid when buying new. Research will be more geographic. The good news is, there are a lot of web tools out there to tell you how much a given model sells for in your area to make sure you're not getting ripped off.
Most car dealerships employ the "third party selling" model. That means that the sales guy is little more than a go-between between you and his manager. So, you have to sort of fire up the sales guy to make things happen on your behalf. Bring your checkbook and:
- Do your research BEFORE you ever talk to a sales rep. Know what you want, what a good deal is and how much you're willing to pay/spend before you venture out.
- A good rep will engage you in conversation, but all the while he should be asking questions to qualify you and set you up to close. A good rep will go with you on the test drive and continue to profile you.
- Be firm, make eye contact, sit up straight but don't be overly d!ckish. Be in charge, but don't be an a-hole.
- Avoid wanting the damned car too much
- Be perfectly willing to walk away
- When you make an offer, include a check with $500 or $1000 so Skippy has something to take back to his manager ("See, he's serious! He gave me a check!")
- Be open to listening to their finance offers. If you can do better with them than your bank, AND they get to make a little F&I money on you, then everyone wins (well, except your bank, I suppose) and the dealer might be a little more flexible on the selling price because he's making F&I money on you
- If you do walk out, the odds are good that they'll "put you out on a rocket". That means the last figure they leave you with, sometimes literally walking alongside you as you walk to your car, is something neither they nor the competition can do. They'll put it as a condition, like, "If I could sell you the car at $30K, could I earn your business now?" - or something like that (see the weasel words in that statement?). At this point, regardless of what they offer, most people are still going to walk - but they will walk with that undoable "rocket figure" etched in mind. So you'll go to other dealers with that figure no one else can do..... then you'll come back to them and the game begins all over again. So.... if you walk and they put a rocket figure out there - GET IT IN WRITING. And if they don't put it in writing, you'll know it is BS.
Keep a couple of things in mind and you'll be fine. First, dealerships live to take as much money from you as they possibly can. Period. Secondly, you're in charge and if you do your research, arrange your own finance and don't get emotional, you'll level the playing field. And lastly, it's just a friggin car. In the grand scheme of things, it's not that big a deal. Keep your perspective. Do your best, find what you like that fits your budget, buy it then move on.