Thus Spoke Zarathustra: Tennessee n Florida

Alvin York

Founding Member
Ultimate Gator Nemesis
BANNED
Jun 12, 2014
1,030
52
Founding Member
God damn, God damn. God Damn.

I"m a walking talking mother ****ing erupting volcano The game in Knoxville, what the **** was that? Nine years in a row we've suffered humiliating losses to these jort lizards from hell. This year, 2014, we were poised to end the drought as we were the odds maker's favorite to bring down a fallen Gator team led by a controversial despised lame duck coach and a questionable mentally weak quarterback and a defense that gave up 700 yards to a Alabama team that would prove to be less than stellar by their upset loss to Ole Miss. We had played highly ranked Oklahoma and Georgia to a virtual standstill in their stadiums The young inexperienced Volunteer team has show firepower in offense and defense We had everything going for us this time.

Before the kickoff the festivities were mind boggling 400 former players. a;ll the legendary larger than life players from the Past joined Tennessee's current roster in running through the "T" . The crowd went berserk. Then the festivities turned another path. What the **** were the Tennessee Power Brokers thinking? They and I don't know really who the hell "they" made the diecision to flash a video pep talk from rapper, Lil Jon to the hillbilly throngs. What exactly does Lil Jon know about Tennessee football and communicating with folks that think Dolly Parton is a Tennessee Saint? We also got Lil Jon as the chief Vol cheerleader and he pumped up the crown on every third down with a remixed version of his song, "Turn Down For What: At this point you don't know whether to laugh or cry hysterically. I can only conclude this was a desperate attempt to augment our recruiting by showing Brother Man that Knoxville overnight had become a larger urban chic hood, a capital of Hip Hop to counter Nashville's being the center of Country Music. What the hell, spin your own theories.

I came in here and stated to win the game the UT D had to push extreme rushing pressure on Driskel to impact his rhythm and confidence. That's exactly what we did. causing numerous critical interceptions. We pissed it all away. Brilliant Butch decided the thing to do was fake the run and keep throwing toward the end zone. The Vol 's
opportunities the D game them with their bogus field goals instead of TD's. In the end Worley jointed a **** load of Tennessee quarterbacks that were fundamentally ineffective in big games. Can't we recruit one decent quarterback that is a presence in important games in the SEC? What about the Defense? Well they played magnificently for 3 quarters shutting out the Gators, the worst Florida offensive showing in the rivalry in decades. But when it counted in the fourth quarter after a critical fumble by Worley the vaunted Tennessee D let this Freon Harris, a no talent bum freshman, go through them like a hot knife through butter. So the defense folded in the biggest game in 10 years before the home crowd. Disgusting. Unacceptable. The signature play for the whole game and I submit the entire decade of losing to the Gators was after the third quarter interception of Driskell. We were knocking on the Gator end zone ready to score a touchdown that arguably would have put the game away considering Florida could not move the ball. The first play Worley goes play action and back peddles with an arm throw off balance to a covered receiver who falls down letting the Florida DB make a diving interception in the end zone canceling out our interception and opportunity to turn the game around in our favor. I can' only conjecture that Worley suddenly thought he was Andrew Luck and decided to take the gamble.

Here's the formula.
Lil Jon +
29 for 28 yards) +
3 FG's instead of 3 TD's) +
Worley's back peddle interception in the end zone) +
Freon Harris
= 10-9, the 10th victory in a row for Florida over Tennessee


I have a proposal that I'll email to the University of Tennessee's AD and President. Let's put this rivalry out of its misery. Why don't we just forfeit the game next year and send Butch to shake hands with congratulations to whoever replaces that loser, Will Muschamp. That way we won't be shocked and devastated by the 11th loss in a row.

They say a picture is worth 1000 words

mf3Jj.jpg
 

gardnerwebbgator

Founding Member
Aight Then
Lifetime Member
Jun 19, 2014
9,557
15,657
Founding Member
Same old rinse and repeat for the past decade, even though we completely reek of ass.

Maybe you should have implanted the great Tebow Trap against JD and Harris. It worked so well before.

Dumbass.
 

Alvin York

Founding Member
Ultimate Gator Nemesis
BANNED
Jun 12, 2014
1,030
52
Founding Member
gardnerwebbalumnigator;n79253 said:
Same old rinse and repeat for the past decade, even though we completely reek of ass.

Maybe you should have implanted the great Tebow Trap against JD and Harris. It worked so well before.

Dumbass.

No, the Tebow Trap was the NFL.
 

TN G8tr

Founding Member
The "Original" TN G8tr
Lifetime Member
Jun 14, 2014
7,402
9,063
Founding Member
SSDD

Same $#!t, Definitely Dork.
 

t-gator

Founding Member
too sexy for my shirt
Lifetime Member
Jun 13, 2014
15,747
18,143
Founding Member
Very nice of you to try to cheer us up. Your sympathy hurts
 

Alvin York

Founding Member
Ultimate Gator Nemesis
BANNED
Jun 12, 2014
1,030
52
Founding Member
KCgator;n79341 said:
How truly sad his life must be if the only "friends" he has are rivals on a message board who make fun of him.

If you are fiends... I mean friends then Allah save me from my enemies.
 

TN G8tr

Founding Member
The "Original" TN G8tr
Lifetime Member
Jun 14, 2014
7,402
9,063
Founding Member
Alvin York;n79345 said:
If you are fiends... I mean friends then Allah save me from my enemies.

You need all the help you can get. UToothless definitely can't save you from anything.
 

Himey

Founding Member
Super Important Member
Lifetime Member
Jun 12, 2014
1,044
1,324
Founding Member
York, will you finally take my advice and stop predicting a Vol victory over the Gators until it actually happens? Even if the Vols are favored in the future, go ahead and assume the Gators will win.
 

TLB

Just chillin'
Lifetime Member
Jan 6, 2015
14,225
26,665
Alvin York;n79244 said:
God damn, God damn. God Damn.

I"m a walking talking mother ****ing erupting volcano The game in Knoxville, what the **** was that? Nine years in a row we've suffered humiliating losses to these jort lizards from hell. This year, 2014, we were poised to end the drought as we were the odds maker's favorite to bring down a fallen Gator team led by a controversial despised lame duck coach and a questionable mentally weak quarterback and a defense that gave up 700 yards to a Alabama team that would prove to be less than stellar by their upset loss to Ole Miss. We had played highly ranked Oklahoma and Georgia to a virtual standstill in their stadiums The young inexperienced Volunteer team has show firepower in offense and defense We had everything going for us this time.

Before the kickoff the festivities were mind boggling 400 former players. a;ll the legendary larger than life players from the Past joined Tennessee's current roster in running through the "T" . The crowd went berserk. Then the festivities turned another path. What the **** were the Tennessee Power Brokers thinking? They and I don't know really who the hell "they" made the diecision to flash a video pep talk from rapper, Lil Jon to the hillbilly throngs. What exactly does Lil Jon know about Tennessee football and communicating with folks that think Dolly Parton is a Tennessee Saint? We also got Lil Jon as the chief Vol cheerleader and he pumped up the crown on every third down with a remixed version of his song, "Turn Down For What: At this point you don't know whether to laugh or cry hysterically. I can only conclude this was a desperate attempt to augment our recruiting by showing Brother Man that Knoxville overnight had become a larger urban chic hood, a capital of Hip Hop to counter Nashville's being the center of Country Music. What the hell, spin your own theories.

I came in here and stated to win the game the UT D had to push extreme rushing pressure on Driskel to impact his rhythm and confidence. That's exactly what we did. causing numerous critical interceptions. We pissed it all away. Brilliant Butch decided the thing to do was fake the run and keep throwing toward the end zone. The Vol 's
opportunities the D game them with their bogus field goals instead of TD's. In the end Worley jointed a **** load of Tennessee quarterbacks that were fundamentally ineffective in big games. Can't we recruit one decent quarterback that is a presence in important games in the SEC? What about the Defense? Well they played magnificently for 3 quarters shutting out the Gators, the worst Florida offensive showing in the rivalry in decades. But when it counted in the fourth quarter after a critical fumble by Worley the vaunted Tennessee D let this Freon Harris, a no talent bum freshman, go through them like a hot knife through butter. So the defense folded in the biggest game in 10 years before the home crowd. Disgusting. Unacceptable. The signature play for the whole game and I submit the entire decade of losing to the Gators was after the third quarter interception of Driskell. We were knocking on the Gator end zone ready to score a touchdown that arguably would have put the game away considering Florida could not move the ball. The first play Worley goes play action and back peddles with an arm throw off balance to a covered receiver who falls down letting the Florida DB make a diving interception in the end zone canceling out our interception and opportunity to turn the game around in our favor. I can' only conjecture that Worley suddenly thought he was Andrew Luck and decided to take the gamble.

Here's the formula.
Lil Jon +
29 for 28 yards) +
3 FG's instead of 3 TD's) +
Worley's back peddle interception in the end zone) +
Freon Harris
= 10-9, the 10th victory in a row for Florida over Tennessee


I have a proposal that I'll email to the University of Tennessee's AD and President. Let's put this rivalry out of its misery. Why don't we just forfeit the game next year and send Butch to shake hands with congratulations to whoever replaces that loser, Will Muschamp. That way we won't be shocked and devastated by the 11th loss in a row.



Found this by accident, figured I'd bump it. Always nice to relive someone else's misery. Especially if it's TN.

Btw, Alvin, you should have sent that email and saved yourselves the heartache.

E11EVEN.IN.A.ROW
 

Zambo

Founding Member
Poo Flinger
Lifetime Member
Jun 12, 2014
12,929
32,582
Founding Member
Even better than reliving elevenessee's misery is remembering Treon coming in on the road to win the game for us.
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Help Users

You haven't joined any rooms.

    Birthdays

    Members online

    Forum statistics

    Threads
    31,717
    Messages
    1,624,796
    Members
    1,644
    Latest member
    TheFoodGator