College roommate stories

[ThreatMatrix]

We all got 'em. Time to share. Not great stories but I'll start and try to keep it short.

Remember Men At Work's Who Can It Be Now? Song was written for him. So he's in the apartment one day and hear's a knock at the door and decides he ain't in the mood for anybody. So he ignores it but the handle starts to jiggle so he decides to go hide in the shower. It was the pest control guy who proceeded to spray the apartment. Got to the bathroom and opened the shower curtain to find my roommate fully clothed.

Same roommate. He kept his rolling tray under the couch and just left his loose weed out plus papers. He's at home alone again. Knock on the door but this time he learned his lesson and doesn't hide. So he watches the pest control guy spray the kitchen, baseboards and to his horror under the couch. He'd been smoking weed laced with pesticide for months.

Not roommates but we lived next to each other in the same apartment complex. I was an Engineering Major so I literally had to study from hangover recovery Sunday to last class Friday. My friends were Business Majors so they could party any night of the week. One night they were tired of my nerd **** and decided they were dragging me out. I locked my door like I often had to do but that wasn't stopping them. They broke the door down, cracked the frame etc. to "save me from studying". My parents later got the bill and I had a hard time explaining that one.

 

[GatorBart]

1994 - Roommate comes home pretty darn drunk after the Gator's BB loss to Duke in the Final Four. After commiserating with him for about 20 seconds, he heads to bed. About 1/2-hour later, the cops show up at the front door to the house. I quickly conceal my stash and go to the door to greet them. They proceed to tell me that they received a complaint that he was involved in a hit and run. I tell them he's gone to bed and asked them to give me a second to rouse him. The cops are behind the screen door and I leave the main door open while I walk down the hall to his room. As I'm entering the room I realize the cops are right behind me - I turn around and ask WTF!? - they're cops, they think they can go anywhere. Anyway, we try to wake my roommate and he's not having any of it - we tried several times. The cops finally give up and ask to speak with me outside where his car is (an old beat up Subaru). They said they saw a dent and wanted to check it out closer. We go out to his car and there's dents all over it - the thing is, not one of the dents was new as they all had some evidence of age (chipped paint, rust). I proceeded to laugh as I realize the cops have nothing to go on for evidence. They eventually leave after asking me to have my roommate call them the next day.
The next day, the roommate explained that he and another fan, who was also drunk, barely hit each other when leaving the Ale House parking lot where they were watching the game. He said the dude did have some minor damage to his car, my roommate didn't, but neither wanted to file a report or wait around for the cops, so they both bolted. Apparently the dude with the damage had second thoughts and called the cops after he got home. Nothing else ever came of the incident that I can remember.

 

[bradgator2]

So for my senior year, my folks gave me a few grand. I talked it over with me roomate, and I decided to pay the first 6 months rent up front with one check. (Boom.... One year of rent paid in full!). He would pay the last 6 months. So around October, he had a bad breakup, followed by mental breakdown, hospitalized for thinking about suicide, withdrawal from school. Oh crap. His mom comes and picks up some of his stuff. I carefully, and politely, ask her, "so..... you know he still owes his half of the rent, right?" "Of course" "And electic bill." "Why?" "Because that still has to be paid, regardless if he is sleeping in his bed that he rented for a year." "Ok, no problem."

Month 7 rolls around and no rent is paid. I call, and they send it in late. It's like this every month. Now realize, his room is still 95% filled like he is living there. He was EE. I went through his room and sold every book I can find. Starting pawning his stuff. He did end up paying his full rent portion, so that was good. When the lease was up, I told the apartment.... Look, I am 100% out.... i have no clue if he coming for his crap. I honestly dont know if he did.

All over a chick.

This was at Oxford Manor.

 

[Gatordiddy]

What struck me the most (and this is neither good or bad...just an observation) - is that there was no mention of any sexual depravity in these three stories.

 

[bradgator2]

What struck me the most (and this is neither good or bad...just an observation) - is that there was no mention of any sexual depravity in these three stories.

Years later, I did bang that girl who broke his heart. She was great.... always had a thing for her.

 

[GatorBart]

What struck me the most (and this is neither good or bad...just an observation) - is that there was no mention of any sexual depravity in these three stories.

Oh, you want those kind of stories?!

 

[MJMGator]

Oh, you want those kind of stories?!

Please...no "experimentation" stories, Bart.

 

[GatorBart]

Okay, different roommate.
This one bought a Harley one year and parked it in our backyard, close to my bedroom window. I was still in grad school, but he worked on campus and rode his Harley to work each day. So it basically wakes me up every morning when he cranks it up to go to work, but I get used to it and fall back to sleep fairly easy after a couple of weeks of this. So one morning I roll out of bed around 10ish (did I mention I was in grad school?), and head to the bathroom thinking it was odd that I didn't hear the Harley startup earlier. Sure enough the door to the bathroom is closed and his bedroom door is open. I walk into his room and it stinks of puke/alcohol/puke, some of you are probably familiar with the smell (he had been out partying the night before). I check the backyard and his Harley is there. After a few minutes I gotta piss really bad so I knock on the door - no answer. So I try to open the door (thankfully it's not locked) and I can only get it open a couple of inches. I can see my roommates naked-ass body is wrapped around the toilet and is blocking me from opening the door any further. Needing to pee really bad, I actually went and pissed outside in the backyard (not on his Harley) and then came back in to roust him. It took about 5 minutes of screaming and yelling at him to get him away from the door where I could actually open it. I brought him a blanket and told him to go lay on a couch and that he could clean his room up later. I went into the bathroom to ****/shower and heard his Harley start up not more than two minutes after. Later I find out he had a very important meeting at 11AM at work that morning that he couldn't miss. I would have loved to have seen him during that meeting.

 

[playzwtrux]

I lived with a crazy chick once for almost 16 years - - but I guess the joke was on me

 

[Zambo]

Lived in Beatty towers my first year with 3 roommates. One guy was a good friend from HS. Another guy was a really cool dude who joined the same fraternity as me. The last guy.....John....total effing dork. He HATED us, because we were always partying and bringing chicks back to the room, etc.

One of the things frat guys would do to punk each other is sneak into each others houses and steal the composite pictures hanging all over the place. We were no different, and after swiping a composite picture from the frat house next to ours, I brought it to the room for safekeeping and we all had a laugh telling the story of our daring raid.

The next day, John was gone, all of his stuff moved out, and no one knew where he had gone. The day after that, I get a knock on the door and its campus police. They come in and see the composite picture and take it as evidence of my crime. A couple weeks later I'm sitting at home back in Jax enjoying my summer and the local Sheriff shows up with a warrant for my arrest. I get hauled away in handcuffs and am charged with Grand Theft. Evidently those composite pictures are above whatever limit is in place between petty and grand theft.

My dad had to come bail me out of jail and we later went to the DAs office and he agreed to give me pre trial intervention. So I kept my nose clean for a year and the charge went away. I'd love to run into John again one day. He used the fact that his roommate was a 'criminal' as a reason to switch dorms, almost causing me a lifetime of grief for doing normal kid stuff tomfoolery.

 

[ppinesgator]

What struck me the most (and this is neither good or bad...just an observation) - is that there was no mention of any sexual depravity in these three stories.

I got PLENTY of those. Don't know what it's like now, but the College of Journalism in 1984 was about 85% female. Someone had to keep them happy.

 

[bradgator2]

John might be Trex

 

[AlexDaGator]

Lived in Beatty towers my first year with 3 roommates. One guy was a good friend from HS. Another guy was a really cool dude who joined the same fraternity as me. The last guy.....John....total effing dork. He HATED us, because we were always partying and bringing chicks back to the room, etc.

One of the things frat guys would do to punk each other is sneak into each others houses and steal the composite pictures hanging all over the place. We were no different, and after swiping a composite picture from the frat house next to ours, I brought it to the room for safekeeping and we all had a laugh telling the story of our daring raid.

The next day, John was gone, all of his stuff moved out, and no one knew where he had gone. The day after that, I get a knock on the door and its campus police. They come in and see the composite picture and take it as evidence of my crime. A couple weeks later I'm sitting at home back in Jax enjoying my summer and the local Sheriff shows up with a warrant for my arrest. I get hauled away in handcuffs and am charged with Grand Theft. Evidently those composite pictures are above whatever limit is in place between petty and grand theft.

My dad had to come bail me out of jail and we later went to the DAs office and he agreed to give me pre trial intervention. So I kept my nose clean for a year and the charge went away. I'd love to run into John again one day. He used the fact that his roommate was a 'criminal' as a reason to switch dorms, almost causing me a lifetime of grief for doing normal kid stuff tomfoolery.

Alex.

 

[Zambo]

Alex.

 

[Gatordiddy]

I got PLENTY of those. Don't know what it's like now, but the College of Journalism in 1984 was about 85% female. Someone had to keep them happy.

No kidding - I was in that college (Broadcasting side) from '82 - '86

 

[Gatordiddy]

Lived in Beatty towers my first year with 3 roommates. One guy was a good friend from HS. Another guy was a really cool dude who joined the same fraternity as me. The last guy.....John....total effing dork. He HATED us, because we were always partying and bringing chicks back to the room, etc.

One of the things frat guys would do to punk each other is sneak into each others houses and steal the composite pictures hanging all over the place. We were no different, and after swiping a composite picture from the frat house next to ours, I brought it to the room for safekeeping and we all had a laugh telling the story of our daring raid.

The next day, John was gone, all of his stuff moved out, and no one knew where he had gone. The day after that, I get a knock on the door and its campus police. They come in and see the composite picture and take it as evidence of my crime. A couple weeks later I'm sitting at home back in Jax enjoying my summer and the local Sheriff shows up with a warrant for my arrest. I get hauled away in handcuffs and am charged with Grand Theft. Evidently those composite pictures are above whatever limit is in place between petty and grand theft.

My dad had to come bail me out of jail and we later went to the DAs office and he agreed to give me pre trial intervention. So I kept my nose clean for a year and the charge went away. I'd love to run into John again one day. He used the fact that his roommate was a 'criminal' as a reason to switch dorms, almost causing me a lifetime of grief for doing normal kid stuff tomfoolery.

Were you on Fraternity Row or one of the outlying Frats?

 

[Zambo]

Were you on Fraternity Row or one of the outlying Frats?

Delta Tau Delta, right by north end zone. Pikes were next door. The composite was from the Delta Upsilon house one block over by Joe's Deli.

 

[GatorBart]

Lived in Beatty towers my first year with 3 roommates. One guy was a good friend from HS. Another guy was a really cool dude who joined the same fraternity as me. The last guy.....John....total effing dork. He HATED us, because we were always partying and bringing chicks back to the room, etc.

One of the things frat guys would do to punk each other is sneak into each others houses and steal the composite pictures hanging all over the place. We were no different, and after swiping a composite picture from the frat house next to ours, I brought it to the room for safekeeping and we all had a laugh telling the story of our daring raid.

The next day, John was gone, all of his stuff moved out, and no one knew where he had gone. The day after that, I get a knock on the door and its campus police. They come in and see the composite picture and take it as evidence of my crime. A couple weeks later I'm sitting at home back in Jax enjoying my summer and the local Sheriff shows up with a warrant for my arrest. I get hauled away in handcuffs and am charged with Grand Theft. Evidently those composite pictures are above whatever limit is in place between petty and grand theft.

My dad had to come bail me out of jail and we later went to the DAs office and he agreed to give me pre trial intervention. So I kept my nose clean for a year and the charge went away. I'd love to run into John again one day. He used the fact that his roommate was a 'criminal' as a reason to switch dorms, almost causing me a lifetime of grief for doing normal kid stuff tomfoolery.

That's a great story Zambo - what a POS roommate that guy was!
1982 - I lived in a quad dorm my freshman year as well and we had one 'dorky' roommate. He used a 100W bulb (no lamp shade) over his desk to study by, didn't drink, and looked like Beaver Cleaver (we called him 'The Beav'). I had an 'Old Style' beer light above my desk, where hardly any studying ever took place. We partied like rock stars in that dorm room and he hated us. He would leave when we were around - we assumed he went to the library or down to the dorm common area to watch TV (we didn't have a TV in our room). I partied so much my first semester he thought for sure I'd be flunking out. Turns out it was him who didn't come back to school. According to our RA, The Beav complained about us to him constantly, unbeknownst to us, and he ended up transferring to a community college closer to home so he could 'get his life in order'. We all had a good chuckle about that. I guess we were pretty mean to him. Funny thing is, the RA was in our room a lot, especially when we had beer and .

 

[Gatordiddy]

WTF is a composite picture

 

[GatorBart]

WTF is a composite picture

Bunch a dorky frat boys getting all dressed up to get their pictures taken.
What year Zambo - are you there? These boys are your brothers from 84. Looks like they were having a good time with it anyway.