- Jun 9, 2014
- 19,752
- 27,650
Founding Member
To: [email protected]
From: The Good Folks at GatorChatter
Re: State of Affairs
Dear Scottie,
Happy Labor Day to you and the lovely missus. Since the banks are closed and you won't be going down to count the money, we hoped you could take a few minutes out of your day to listen to our concerns.
It's that nagging football team thing. It's been three presidential terms since we were relevant and longer since we strung together back-to-back first downs. It's gotten so desperate we've resorted to living vicariously through the ex-quarterback up in Morgantown. You know who we're talking about, right? The long-haired reject who tossed more bombs last night than Kim after a bad evening out at the Pyongyang strip clubs?
We're not going to ask you to explain why you have a boner for Mac or Nuss or why you cried at the ribbon cutting for the new state-of-the art lacrosse facility. All we're asking for is 10 points from the offense. Is that asking too much? We can back it off to seven if it is.
Please consider our reasonable request and please consider the possibility for empty seats for Northern Colorado. Unfortunately, some bonehead scheduled a crochet match on campus at the same time.
Look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely yours,
The Boys from Ol' Florida
From: The Good Folks at GatorChatter
Re: State of Affairs
Dear Scottie,
Happy Labor Day to you and the lovely missus. Since the banks are closed and you won't be going down to count the money, we hoped you could take a few minutes out of your day to listen to our concerns.
It's that nagging football team thing. It's been three presidential terms since we were relevant and longer since we strung together back-to-back first downs. It's gotten so desperate we've resorted to living vicariously through the ex-quarterback up in Morgantown. You know who we're talking about, right? The long-haired reject who tossed more bombs last night than Kim after a bad evening out at the Pyongyang strip clubs?
We're not going to ask you to explain why you have a boner for Mac or Nuss or why you cried at the ribbon cutting for the new state-of-the art lacrosse facility. All we're asking for is 10 points from the offense. Is that asking too much? We can back it off to seven if it is.
Please consider our reasonable request and please consider the possibility for empty seats for Northern Colorado. Unfortunately, some bonehead scheduled a crochet match on campus at the same time.
Look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely yours,
The Boys from Ol' Florida