Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Spoilery Review

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Gatormac2112, Dec 26, 2019.

  1. Gatormac2112

    Gatormac2112 The Voice of Reason
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    • Swamp Donkey

      Swamp Donkey Bring Back Mohamed, Slev and Assquish
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      Kilo hasnt won a single fight in this entire trilogy.

      So true. Worst villain ever.
       
      • MJMGator

        MJMGator Slightly amused
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        • Jbossgator8

          Jbossgator8 Senior Member
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          Just can't compare to the original trilogy
           
          • ThreatMatrix

            ThreatMatrix In shambles
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            The Star Wars Trilogy trilogy (AKA the Skywalker Saga) died with Luke in EP 8. I have no interest in seeing Ep 9. After Ep 8 it was unfixable.
             
          • Captain Sasquatch

            Captain Sasquatch Mr. SQ, the Sashole
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            Saw it today, it was so bad. Jumped from scene to scene at breakneck speed without explaining half of what was going on. There were probably a dozen or more times when whatever quest was happening was foiled, only to be miraculously saved by a previously unknown solution 30 seconds later. "I have no money to pay for groceries." "Oh look, I found this winning Powerball ticket for $600M!!!" The whole movie was like that. The entire plot was like a video game with side quests and level ups throughout. Usually I can come away from a movie with SOME type of redeeming quality, but I can't even do that here. I guess the special effects were really good, so it had that going for it.

            And the worst offense was the climax was basically a plot point for plot point remake of the Avengers: Endgame finale. All hope is lost in an epic battle for the universe, but here's this giant fleet of ships and warriors to help at the last second! Big bad is about to kill everyone, says, "I am _________," then the hero says, "And I am ___________," and kills the big bad. The end.
             
            • Swamp Donkey

              Swamp Donkey Bring Back Mohamed, Slev and Assquish
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              All the twats hate it.

              No gay love scenes sealed the deal.
               
              • Swamp Donkey

                Swamp Donkey Bring Back Mohamed, Slev and Assquish
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                Eight was putrid.

                The characters do suck, but frankly they mimic our Millennials, and they are no doubt meant to resonate with them.
                 
                • Captain Sasquatch

                  Captain Sasquatch Mr. SQ, the Sashole
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                  Wait, did you actually like this one?
                   
                • Swamp Donkey

                  Swamp Donkey Bring Back Mohamed, Slev and Assquish
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                  yes.
                   
                  • Facepalm Facepalm x 2
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                  • ShelbyGator

                    ShelbyGator Well-Known Member
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                    How could any Star Wars fan like this POS? I don't blame JJ for it. I blame Rian Johnson and Kathleen Kennedy. Series was too far gone. Should have gone with Palpatine clone instead of family ties.
                     
                    • Swamp Donkey

                      Swamp Donkey Bring Back Mohamed, Slev and Assquish
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                      Mehhhh...the new characters are horrible. But altogether it was shallow fun. I wont watch it multiple times or anything, but it helped to change the azimuth from the previous whiny emo millenial garbage.
                       
                      • ThreatMatrix

                        ThreatMatrix In shambles
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                        In Sas's view 8 was a cinematic masterpiece.
                        I can't think of a more glowing recommendation to see the film than Sas hated it. However I really can't give a shyt about any of the characters anymore.
                         
                        • Captain Sasquatch

                          Captain Sasquatch Mr. SQ, the Sashole
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                          I didn't like 8. It's pretty well known that I view the Star Wars franchise as 7 mediocre at best films that followed 2 borderline masterpieces. I know it triggered the ever loving sh*t out of candy ass pansies like you and Law that women and minorities had starring roles in 8 and 9, but the rest of the developed world didn't care.
                           
                          • Captain Sasquatch

                            Captain Sasquatch Mr. SQ, the Sashole
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                            Which part did you like? Finn screaming all of his lines of dialogue? The cringey Chewbacca fake out death? The fact that it jumped scenes every 28 seconds? The 39 deus ex machinas? The completely out of left field kiss between Rey and Kylo Ren and his random death immediately after?
                             
                            • gingerlover

                              gingerlover Junior Member
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                              I don't think the kiss was out of left field. They have been building them together since 8. I do agree that the pacing was all over the place and could have used a little more time to slow some things down to give us critical things like a Knights of Ren backstory, even if just a minute to give them some sort of background. They got built up for 3 movies to be glorified guards. I did like the nod to some of the jedi in the animated series, but would have loved them to do visuals with some of the others when they talked or if they had just give a one second glimpse of the ghost crew. I hated when Voldemort and Harry dueled at the end and the elder wands deflected his spell back on him.
                               
                              • MJMGator

                                MJMGator Slightly amused
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                                • Swamp Queen

                                  Swamp Queen Mrs. Sasquatch
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                                  He liked the lesbian kiss, don’t let him fool you.
                                   
                                  • GatorTruth133

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                                    Well, it was better than The Last Jedi, but from what I understand so was 2 Girls, One Cup. I have stayed away from the latter, but would rather trade 5 minutes than watch the literal abortion I watched for almost 2 hours in 2017.
                                     
                                    • Captain Sasquatch

                                      Captain Sasquatch Mr. SQ, the Sashole
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                                      :triggered:
                                       

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